Archives for : 10 Things

The Novel, Part II

So, here is the next chapter of the story/novel I am writing. Remember, it is only preliminary, and feel free to share and criticisms or comments. It’s the only way I’ll grow 😉

But, before the unveiling, some news!

– New trailer for Diablo Cody’s latest, called Jennifer’s Body. It’s everything you would expect from her, and looks really, really good.
WARNING: TRAILER IS RATED R. Not suitable for kiddies, guy with heart problems, or excitable pee-ers.

– One of my favourite shows, Dexter, returns for season 4 on September 27th!

– In the land of Hollywood, movies are constantly being re-made into different versions of themselves. BUt, who ever would have thought that a movie would be turned into a TV show … on ABC Family. The movie 10 Things I Hate About You, based on Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew, was released in 1999. I remember watching it in the theatre with my sister! And now, they are making a new show, entitled, surprise, surprise 10 Things I Hate ABout You.

And now, what you all have been (hopefully) waiting for!

And here’s the title I’m thinking of for the story/novel … The Black.

Here is the first chapter!!! Enjoy!!

Chapter 1


This is a tough thing to write. You know how when most people are kids, they have some sort of a journal? Well, this is sorta like that. But, this is more like a recollection of the events of the previous few weeks in my surprisingly busy life. I mean, with all the death and stuff that has happened around me, you would think I was in the middle of the Apocalypse.

Hahahahahahahahaha. Now that’s funny. I mean, like pee yourself laughing funny. But, I’m getting ahead of myself. You’ll understand that joke once I get started.

First, some background about your protagonist, me!

My name is Roger, and I am currently a 25 year old from New York City. I was born in Canada, but that doesn’t matter to the story.

I graduated high school, went to college, and got a degree in biomedical engineering and ancient history. Eccelctic resume, eh?

I now work for a biotechnology company known as ANUBIS. It stands for some stupid shit that makes no sense, but, it’s a job.

According to the business card in my wallet, right next to the wallet condom that every guy has, ANUBIS stands for ANother Unique Biological Investigative System.

My specific job description is that I am a laboratory technician. It’s as boring as it sounds.

Basically, I do all the grunt work that the egg-heads are too busy to do. I receive experimental drugs from different companies or researchers, and test them on various animals (anything ranging from mice to monkeys).

Now we can get started.

It all began about six weeks ago.

I had just broken up with my girlfriend, Rachel, and was pretty down in the dumps about my life. Yeah, it’ s sappy and cliché, but what do you want me to say? It’s the truth, and believe me, this truth is stranger than any fiction you could ever imagine.

Right. So, here begins the story.

I awoke from my sleep with a jolt. I vaguely remembered having a strange dream about a man in a hotel room laughing. It was slightly disconcerting, but, it was only a dream.

The dream slowly faded away, like all dreams do, given enough time. Shaking it off, I them proceeded with my usual morning routine.

Stretch, Poop, Stretch, Eat, Shower, Pee, Change and leave the apartment by 8 am.

Like a Swiss watch. Always perfectly timed. Except today.

I sneezed while stretching, couldn’t poop, was out of cereal and toilet paper, and I forgot to do the laundry. Because of all those things, I left the apartment at 8:23 am. Twenty-three minutes later than I should have.

What would have happened if I had left at my normal time of 8 am?

To be honest, I did not know. But I do know that I wouldn’t be where I am right now, writing my ipso-facto memoirs, so that what happened to me, my friends and the planet, will not be lost by the annals of history.